As much as it saddens me to admit it and some sources consider it to last six weeks, we have left the wonderful kraamtijd phase. The maternity nurse has left, the bedverhogers have been returned and Mark has gone back to work. We are trying to find a new family routine while dealing with newborn cramps and running on minimal sleep. My parents are here which on one side helps and on the other side causes some undesirable effects, like Una acting out a lot more than usual. It all sounds stressful but in all honesty, I could not be happier. And I am not talking the hormones induced delirious happiness of the first few days (I kept telling Mark several times a day “I am so happy”) but deep, overwhelming feenling of love and completeness.
The biggest adjustment to me is not having a newborn and all that comes along, sleep deprivation, nappy changes and all that. I have done this before and I had a very good idea of what was in store for me, at least in the first weeks. So it is not (only) having a child that I am adjusting to, it is having two children. And while I never doubted that I could love the second child as much as I love Una (wise people told me that the love doubles and I believed them :)), what no one told me (probably because it is so obvious yet it really hit me) is that while the love does double, the time halves. And while before Nestor’s arrival spending a lot of my time with Una was the most natural thing in the world now that time has to get shared between the two of them. In the simplest of words, while I would love to spend the whole day snuggling with Una and reading to her, as she is in the middle of another reading phase, I would also love to just hold Nestor and gaze at him all day long.
I guess it will get easier once they are at the age when we can all play together (I am a huge fan of board games and can’t wait to play them with my kids). Until then I will just have to get used to this new situation and find comfort in the fact that they traded a bit of time with their mum for the best gift ever – a sibling. In the meantime, if any of you mums of two have any useful tips, I am all ears.